Sherman Dorn

Baggy-pants bingo

Instead of ideas such as the bill proposed by Florida Senator Gary Siplin, who suggested making droopy pants illegal, I have a much simpler idea: peer pressure.

For those who need to justify this with jargon, try "I am using negative-reinforcement shaping with advanced face-to-face social networking combined with vicarious spasmodic recognition signals and aural-mode synaptic connections." That is, maybe listening to the laughter following a "bingo!" call will... er... drop the incidence rate a bit.

Figuring out which box is for underwear color (or decoration), which for the time of incident, and which is for the consequence is up to the reader.